My Suicide Note

Some of you know, some don't, that my five book memoir series began as a suicide note. At page 50 I was banging out an AA ninth step, and by page 100 it began to look like a good book.

Why would someone write the things I've written about my past?

Because I wasn't supposed to be around when people read it.

There are a lot of hard truths in these books, and I got 3/4 of the way through chapter nine last night and came face to face with one that needs to be told, but I don't want to tell.

If there were a rock of crack the size of a Volkswagen in my living room I'd take a hose to it. It's a miracle. I haven't wanted to get high for years, and rarely think about it.

I was told that I was getting $40 more than I thought from my UK book royalties yesterday, and my first thought was of a gal who needed help.

When I was a kid all I wanted to be is a superhero, and yesterday I got to be Superman  to a mentally ill kid and her mom. :)

I'm still in awe of the change in me. I tried for years to be half the man I am today without any results, and that's why I'm convinced that these books are divinly inspired. I don't believe in God at times, and others I'm a true believer, but one lesson through all my spiritual interests is that God is referred to as the truth. If there's a greater God than the truth, pull up a seat and tell me all about it

If something is 99% truth it's a lie. There's no contending that. So, I'm going to leave the content of this book as it is and finish the way it started and continued. It hurts to tell the story, but the story is the story, and I can't go back and change things, so there it is.

It's not my intention to hurt anyone with these books, it's to tell the stories of survivors who have been called liars their whole lives. This is their story as well

The book doesn't get much easier after chapter nine, but telling my sins has become a lot easier over the years.

So, last night was a rough night. I wish I could take the day off, but I'm shooting for a August 1st release. It's a shame because it looks like it's going to be a lovely day :)

Have a great Sunday people